WHAT'S YOUR ADDICTION?
So how do you cope with life, with pain and disappointment?
How do you distract yourself from your unrest?
What’s your drug of choice?
Alcohol, Cocaine, Crack, Heroine, Uppers, Downers or both?
Or are you one of us sophisticated addicts who wouldn’t dream of taking drugs?
Do you medicate your life with something a little more socially acceptable?
Sex, Affairs, Love, Relationships, Romance, Religion, Spirituality, Emotions,Intellect, Family, Marriage, Care-taking, Controlling, Having Babies, Food, Exercise, Work, Money, Smoking, Gambling, Spending, Volunteerism, Perfectionism, Under-achieving,Meetings, Television, Vacationism, Soap Operas, Nail Biting, Sadness, Negative Thinking, Denial and Lying?
Whew…wait a minute… aren’t some of these (you might be asking)…good things?
Well yes, of course they are.
As you can start to see, it’s not so much what we do to escape our lives, it’s why we do it and the way we do it (or don’t do it).
Some addictions that reside within us are never acted upon, yet they are still destroying us from the inside out. These are the silent killers of our soul, our energetic body and if they remain hidden long enough go deep into our psyche and manifest as disease and illness in our physical and emotional bodies.
Yet, using addiction to cope with life, in fact does not necessarily stop you from being functional. Many people who use addiction to cope lead fairly productive lives. And my opinion is that we're all addictions and in fact have incarnated to release all attachment. Addictions don't stop us from living life in most cases. Addiction IS our process. In fact, many great things have been accomplished by people who are trying to fill a hollow space inside of them, dull some aching pain or simply escape the disappointment of life. And some of us are so adept at employing the process of addiction, that we have a host of addictions that we play like a symphony.
Addictions and unhealthy attachments are pretty good coping mechanisms….At first…especially the ones that don’t “look” like addictions. At first, you think you’ve rifled through your life skills toolbox and found just the right tool. Because at first the pain is lessened and you can function.
But then comes time for the awful payback. Because you made a trade that you didn’t know about. Some people think that we slide deeper and deeper into addiction because we were fooled.
But the real story, is that we are the ones who fooled ourselves.
At the top of everyone’s addiction list is Denial and lying..
So if you plan to release yourself from the bondage of your addictive processes that is obviously the first one to break with.
Right? Make sense?
Addiction is bigger than you are.
It seems to fill a….NEED.
And once it take hold in your life there is no reasoning with it.
You can’t control it.
No YOU cannot control your addictions.
Want to know why?
Because attempting to control and forcing is what got you here in the first place.
You are so much smarter than you think you are…
That’s right…you are absolutely brilliant
You know exactly what you need. This knowledge is part of who you are.
You are programmed to desire, it’s part of your eternal flame. You are also programmed to succeed.
But you tried to second guess yourself and you simply missed the mark.
We know how THAT feels!
You need to FEEL GOOD!
You need to erase PAIN.
You need to be able to FUNCTION in society.
You need to be HAPPY.
Deep in your soul you know you are not meant to suffer.
And so you set to work to stop the suffering.
Your natural state is to be joyfully creative.
You are meant to be in the LIGHT
This knowledge is encoded in your DNA.
The only problem is that you saw a light
You saw it and went to it…
And it was not really the LIGHT.
Just like a Moth to a flame or a Whale to a beach
Hey, if it can happen to them, it can happen to you, right?
You were fooled.
Know why?
Because you were looking in the wrong place. Kind of like when you can’t find your glasses anywhere, only later you REALIZE they’re been perched on top of your head all along.. Hmmm…
So, where is the best place to find the light?
Well, how about in the dark… right?
Something shiny isn’t going to fool you in the dark, that’s for sure.
It’s too dark in there! Only real LIGHT can illuminate the darkness.
But where can you go where it will be dark enough to get to the LIGHT?
How about inside of you?
Now we’re getting somewhere.
In the dark night of your soul, in the womb of your Self is a flame.
That flame…..
That’s the LIGHT.
That’s the one you want.
You have to travel through the dark
To get to the LIGHT.
It’s OK.
We’ve got your back.
We’ve been through it and we made it.
And we’ve come back for you.
We’ve come back to tell you that there is an other side.
To tell you that people can change.
There is an actual map which can help you navigate this.
No, really…a geographical map…North, South, East, West…all the directions….Up and Down, too.
It’s a map of you and it’s a map of your world.
It’s a sort of diagram to your human landscape and the terrain of your life.
This map is thousands of years old. You already know about this map, but you forgot.
And this map will help you find your way. (No, it’s not the Bible, Torah, Talmud, Buddha or anything else outside of you –(You can take these things on your trip if you want to).
Make no mistake, it is your way to find.
In fact, finding your way….that’s what heals you.
All we and your fellow travelers do is hold the space and hopefully some LIGHT, so you can see your way when you’re in the dark places.
It’s your journey to make.
We made it through and we are living proof that it is possible to do so.
There are many others who know this, too.
There is a cure for addiction.
All and any addiction can be healed.
Chances are you’ve got more than one.
And many things we don’t consider to be addictions are.
Really anything you do that prevents you from going to the dark and finding the LIGHT can become an addiction.
Some people are so clever that they have a host of socially acceptable addictions, which they play like a symphony.
Whether you’re addicted to booze or your girlfriend, food or sex.
Addiction is not a genetic disease.
It is a dis-ease of the spirit. To be more precise it is the result of an imbalance.
It is a misguided attempt at self-healing, really nothing more….and nothing less.
But paradoxically, dis-ease is part of how we evolve and so it's all perfect.
Maybe your family taught you how to be an addict
And maybe society played a hand in it, too.
But it is not
WHO YOU ARE!
And when it is truly healed…
It is TAKEN from you.
And you will KNOW when it is gone.
The desire to do the addiction is gone because the addictive coping process becomes obsolete and unnecessary.
It is replaced with a measure of wholeness and a feeling of completeness unlike anything you have ever previously experienced.
And with every day you spend on this journey the connection to your Self is restored, the hole in your heart heals and your cup will begin to overflow, like a crimp has been taken out of the garden hose.
The only way to get to this is to forge all the way through
To the OTHER side, come full circle and get back to where you began.
We’re going to take a trip, fellow travelers.
A trip to the core of your Self.
You’ll need hiking boots, bathing suit, pen, journal, binoculars and camera (zoom and wide angle lenses are a bonus)
Oh yes…and don’t forget your compass. You’ll be needing that for sure.
We’re going to take a journey. I know what you’re thinking….not another spiritual journey.
This isn’t just a spiritual journey.
When we said get out those things, we weren’t kidding or speaking metaphorically.
This thing we call life…That’s the journey.. and you’re kind of already doing it. The only difference now, is that you are going to begin to become aware, awake and alive during the process.
So, while we will be dealing with things you can’t see, we will be dealing with plenty that you can.
Everyone’s journey is the same, but everyone’s journey is different.
Oh yeah, and you’ll need to get real comfortable with paradoxes.
After all you can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it, right?
We’ll visit breathtaking vistas you’ve barely dreampt of, hear a song like you’ve never heard it before, discover the magic of air, the miracle of water, the flame that ignites our souls, the power of the earth and the simple truth about being human.
Ultimately, when you end this journey you will be back at the door to yourself and you will carry with you the wisdom that in fact you are the door to everything. (Now where were those glasses?)
Don’t worry there’s lots of guides and lots of help along the way.
You’ll learn how to spot them and call to them. We’ll help you if you ask.
Remember to ask…that is key (remember that thing about desire?)
So get ready…Get your supplies and your bearings
Because this trip’s going to take about 8 months, maybe longer for some.
We’re starting in the East.
In the East we deal with Illumination, Clarity and Shattering of Illusions. The view here is magnificent!
That wide angle lens comes in real handy right about now.
So, are you Ready?
OK then, let’s go…
One foot in front of the other.
Click here to Start Now.
Friday, April 04, 2008
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
The Alchemy of Addiction
Addiction typically makes us feel weak, out of control and self-destructive. We think that we have no will power and are weak willed. We may even think we are unredeamable, a lost cause, blocked, too far gone, hooked, out there, too weird, stupid, ignorant, broken and possibly just plain dumb. I would agree that if this is how we are feeling, then this is in fact our reality. Yet even these lower levels of reality have doorways into new tracks of thinking. For there is nothing that can help us jump track quicker than overwhelming pain, doubt, fear and humiliation which can often give us a glimpse of another world, even if it is something that we can't quite put our finger on yet. Because there is much more here than meets the eye and somewhere in our heart and soul we know it. There is a mystery here and it is begging to be solved. Our soul is trying to get our attention. And if we will sit with and be still and let our spirit communicate with us in language and symbol, rather than through our own bewildering behavior and polluted thoughts we will start to see an alternate and even a parallel reality...not in some metaphysical airy fairy way, but with our physical eyes and even our logical mind!
In the concrete levels of reality we may be doctors, lawyers, accountants, janitors, librarians, college students, homemakers, technicians, life coaches, psychotherapists, financial planners, soldiers, teachers, self-employed or unemployed. We may drink, take drugs, get depressed, overeat, under eat, work too much, volunteer too much, give too much, take too much, try to control everything, get cancer, steal, rape and kill. But amidst all that even in the lower levels, the good, the bad and the ugly we are also lightworkers, angels incarnate, bodhisattvas, shamans, exorcists and alchemists. We are human. We are divine. Above all we are healers in whatever it is that we do. Many of us, however, may have started to notice that the vanquishing of one addiction leads to ever increasing levels of sobriety in multiple arenas of our life. And if denial is allowed to continue to peel away we may be staggered at the sheer volume of layered and hidden addictions that are often covered in "goodness" and repression. Crafty, resourceful and clever are we! Yet as we bravely continue to face our darkness, some can see the addictions peeling away often in quantum leaps as we excavate our soul and bring in the Light. And this is where our treasure is buried.
Addiction is the path of the earth/spirit warrior. It's what we came here to conquer. It has taken us thousands of years to even recognize and understand our "foe". All darkness and negativity arises out of the addictive process. We walk into this battle in spite of our fear, not because we don't feel it, but because we know that who we really are and what we can evolve into makes it necessary to engage with our own personal Armageddon. Some of us have seen what is on the other side of our pain and fear and we have been forever changed because of it. We have taken our base metal, our base nature, and allowed it to transform us into something very precious. We have transmuted our darkness into golden light. We emerge victorious in complete freedom. We are freedom fighters of the highest order, but we do not resist our enemy. We turn it to the Light and use it against itself. We tune the frequencies of addiction, compulsion and codependency into their opposite spectrums of devotion, sacred ceremony and unconditional love. We see the interplay of shadow and light and we honor our personal paths to freedom. Our mission, quite simply, is to free our spirit and soul to manifest on the physical plane and to evolve into our full human potential to create a life worth living.
Addictions are simply pointing out to us how much freedom we are willing to allow ourselves. Addictions whet our appetite for true freedom and make us hunger for something more. They give us a peak at our capacity for passion, devotion and true love. Addictions will ring our bell. And the bell tolls for each of us, for our connection to our highest self, the part of us that is limitless and free. These are not just any bells, but wedding bells heralding a mystical marriage, the union of our body and spirit. Our soul is knocking at our door, like an ardent lover come calling and asking for our hand. And it won't let up, because this is a divine union that no man can put asunder, not even ourselves.
Addiction is the ringbearer of our soul, cavorting down the aisle, maybe shirt tail askew, but nevertheless, bringing the ring. And in the marriage lies the paradox, for at the moment of joining and commitment something new is born self to Self, like Beauty and the Beast. Something so grand, so magnificent that it remains unnamable until that very moment. And that something is a new version of our former selves that may be barely recognizable to our own earthbound eyes. This is the promise of the union. And in that moment we come to know that there is no other way but to let freedom ring. Resistance is not only futile, it is not necessary. For this is not about being safe, this is about being free. This is not about fear, this is about overflowing, never ending, eternally abundant love. And this love can only be experienced in true freedom.
Once this fight for true freedom, not just sobriety is engaged, the mundane ceases to exist and the exhilaration of the true nature of the heart and soul begins to take root. So when we reach this place, and make our way through hell and back and see what awaits on the other side of addiction and crisis, we are transformed into freedom fighters who come back to run rescue operations on those who still suffer. And we come back not out of duty or obligation, but because we have been re-programmed through the circuitry of our heart and soul to assist others on their journey to the other side, because what we have seen, what we have become, what we carry back with us is this amazing grace which now clings to our body and soul like a new garment.
We know that if nothing more than through a smile, a kind word, a hug, a listening ear we carry within us the unspeakably rare and precious antidote to all addiction: compassion, forgiveness, unconditional love and self love. This is love incarnate. Many of us are invisible warriors, no longer engaged in codepent "fixing". We understand the art of doing without doing. We understand power versus force at its truest essence. For us, a smile is no longer just a smile, but a way to set body chemistry aright, to shine a ray of love out into the world and a sign of affection for its witnesses. It is a beam of love projecting and connecting to sources by most unseen, triggering an avalanche of support and energy. A thesis could be written on the power and beauty of a single smile if we only knew. This knowledge, wisdom such as this, quietly integrated into a life is what makes all the difference. Awareness of simple, quiet, unsung everyday miracles, is the lightworkers way.
As we unveil our power the implications of this at first looms large. For we now know that we are a healer and a lightworker and we know that this is what we have resisted all along. And we know that this is what was being born within us, honed and crafted in the womb of our soul. Finally, we begin to see the power and the glory of the kingdom accessible through our spirit made manifest in the flesh. And we now know without one shadow of doubt that we are divine. Before these words were at best allegory and at worst not applicable, now this concept is self-evident because it has been cross-stiched and interwoven into our experience in a manner as radiant and dependable as the rising sun. And what's more, because we know who and what we are, we now know that human...all humans....even the drunks, the robbers, and the junkies are also, divine. We know that even when WE were at our worst we were still divine.
Our soul starts to tickle us with inklings of the limitlessness and the possibilities. And when we realize that we have tracked our personal mystery down and jumped into an alternate reality, something clicks inside of us and life becomes an amazing adventure. Pain and suffering no longer have the bite they once had, perceptions are clearer, thoughts are purer and love is truer. Life is good, even when weird things are happening. Being human isn't what we thought it once was at all. And we are sobered to realize that there is always going to be more. And the knowledge that we are standing on the shoulders of the way we used to be brings us tears of gratitude. And the knowledge that one day we will stand on the shoulders of the way we are now gives us the three things we cannot be without: Faith in what we cannot now see, Hope that there is an eternal will to good at work in the world, and Love and appreciation of all creation, including and most especially ourselves. And this changes everything, even as it changes nothing.
This is the path, the path of addiction, a sacred pathway to healing, enlightenment, empowerment, wisdom and awareness. We find that this dirty, humble road we've been traveling has been swept clean to reveal just below the surface a street of gold. The wheel comes full turn, the snake is eating its tail and worlds are without end, kingdoms and places in the soul as yet to be discovered beckon us on to adventure. The process of addiction has alchemically changed our soul. Quite simply our addiction has helped us give birth to a new consciousness and opens the door of everything that has been waiting inside of us. It activates our ability to create the reality of heaven on earth. This is the Alchemy of Addiction.
Addiction typically makes us feel weak, out of control and self-destructive. We think that we have no will power and are weak willed. We may even think we are unredeamable, a lost cause, blocked, too far gone, hooked, out there, too weird, stupid, ignorant, broken and possibly just plain dumb. I would agree that if this is how we are feeling, then this is in fact our reality. Yet even these lower levels of reality have doorways into new tracks of thinking. For there is nothing that can help us jump track quicker than overwhelming pain, doubt, fear and humiliation which can often give us a glimpse of another world, even if it is something that we can't quite put our finger on yet. Because there is much more here than meets the eye and somewhere in our heart and soul we know it. There is a mystery here and it is begging to be solved. Our soul is trying to get our attention. And if we will sit with and be still and let our spirit communicate with us in language and symbol, rather than through our own bewildering behavior and polluted thoughts we will start to see an alternate and even a parallel reality...not in some metaphysical airy fairy way, but with our physical eyes and even our logical mind!
In the concrete levels of reality we may be doctors, lawyers, accountants, janitors, librarians, college students, homemakers, technicians, life coaches, psychotherapists, financial planners, soldiers, teachers, self-employed or unemployed. We may drink, take drugs, get depressed, overeat, under eat, work too much, volunteer too much, give too much, take too much, try to control everything, get cancer, steal, rape and kill. But amidst all that even in the lower levels, the good, the bad and the ugly we are also lightworkers, angels incarnate, bodhisattvas, shamans, exorcists and alchemists. We are human. We are divine. Above all we are healers in whatever it is that we do. Many of us, however, may have started to notice that the vanquishing of one addiction leads to ever increasing levels of sobriety in multiple arenas of our life. And if denial is allowed to continue to peel away we may be staggered at the sheer volume of layered and hidden addictions that are often covered in "goodness" and repression. Crafty, resourceful and clever are we! Yet as we bravely continue to face our darkness, some can see the addictions peeling away often in quantum leaps as we excavate our soul and bring in the Light. And this is where our treasure is buried.
Addiction is the path of the earth/spirit warrior. It's what we came here to conquer. It has taken us thousands of years to even recognize and understand our "foe". All darkness and negativity arises out of the addictive process. We walk into this battle in spite of our fear, not because we don't feel it, but because we know that who we really are and what we can evolve into makes it necessary to engage with our own personal Armageddon. Some of us have seen what is on the other side of our pain and fear and we have been forever changed because of it. We have taken our base metal, our base nature, and allowed it to transform us into something very precious. We have transmuted our darkness into golden light. We emerge victorious in complete freedom. We are freedom fighters of the highest order, but we do not resist our enemy. We turn it to the Light and use it against itself. We tune the frequencies of addiction, compulsion and codependency into their opposite spectrums of devotion, sacred ceremony and unconditional love. We see the interplay of shadow and light and we honor our personal paths to freedom. Our mission, quite simply, is to free our spirit and soul to manifest on the physical plane and to evolve into our full human potential to create a life worth living.
Addictions are simply pointing out to us how much freedom we are willing to allow ourselves. Addictions whet our appetite for true freedom and make us hunger for something more. They give us a peak at our capacity for passion, devotion and true love. Addictions will ring our bell. And the bell tolls for each of us, for our connection to our highest self, the part of us that is limitless and free. These are not just any bells, but wedding bells heralding a mystical marriage, the union of our body and spirit. Our soul is knocking at our door, like an ardent lover come calling and asking for our hand. And it won't let up, because this is a divine union that no man can put asunder, not even ourselves.
Addiction is the ringbearer of our soul, cavorting down the aisle, maybe shirt tail askew, but nevertheless, bringing the ring. And in the marriage lies the paradox, for at the moment of joining and commitment something new is born self to Self, like Beauty and the Beast. Something so grand, so magnificent that it remains unnamable until that very moment. And that something is a new version of our former selves that may be barely recognizable to our own earthbound eyes. This is the promise of the union. And in that moment we come to know that there is no other way but to let freedom ring. Resistance is not only futile, it is not necessary. For this is not about being safe, this is about being free. This is not about fear, this is about overflowing, never ending, eternally abundant love. And this love can only be experienced in true freedom.
Once this fight for true freedom, not just sobriety is engaged, the mundane ceases to exist and the exhilaration of the true nature of the heart and soul begins to take root. So when we reach this place, and make our way through hell and back and see what awaits on the other side of addiction and crisis, we are transformed into freedom fighters who come back to run rescue operations on those who still suffer. And we come back not out of duty or obligation, but because we have been re-programmed through the circuitry of our heart and soul to assist others on their journey to the other side, because what we have seen, what we have become, what we carry back with us is this amazing grace which now clings to our body and soul like a new garment.
We know that if nothing more than through a smile, a kind word, a hug, a listening ear we carry within us the unspeakably rare and precious antidote to all addiction: compassion, forgiveness, unconditional love and self love. This is love incarnate. Many of us are invisible warriors, no longer engaged in codepent "fixing". We understand the art of doing without doing. We understand power versus force at its truest essence. For us, a smile is no longer just a smile, but a way to set body chemistry aright, to shine a ray of love out into the world and a sign of affection for its witnesses. It is a beam of love projecting and connecting to sources by most unseen, triggering an avalanche of support and energy. A thesis could be written on the power and beauty of a single smile if we only knew. This knowledge, wisdom such as this, quietly integrated into a life is what makes all the difference. Awareness of simple, quiet, unsung everyday miracles, is the lightworkers way.
As we unveil our power the implications of this at first looms large. For we now know that we are a healer and a lightworker and we know that this is what we have resisted all along. And we know that this is what was being born within us, honed and crafted in the womb of our soul. Finally, we begin to see the power and the glory of the kingdom accessible through our spirit made manifest in the flesh. And we now know without one shadow of doubt that we are divine. Before these words were at best allegory and at worst not applicable, now this concept is self-evident because it has been cross-stiched and interwoven into our experience in a manner as radiant and dependable as the rising sun. And what's more, because we know who and what we are, we now know that human...all humans....even the drunks, the robbers, and the junkies are also, divine. We know that even when WE were at our worst we were still divine.
Our soul starts to tickle us with inklings of the limitlessness and the possibilities. And when we realize that we have tracked our personal mystery down and jumped into an alternate reality, something clicks inside of us and life becomes an amazing adventure. Pain and suffering no longer have the bite they once had, perceptions are clearer, thoughts are purer and love is truer. Life is good, even when weird things are happening. Being human isn't what we thought it once was at all. And we are sobered to realize that there is always going to be more. And the knowledge that we are standing on the shoulders of the way we used to be brings us tears of gratitude. And the knowledge that one day we will stand on the shoulders of the way we are now gives us the three things we cannot be without: Faith in what we cannot now see, Hope that there is an eternal will to good at work in the world, and Love and appreciation of all creation, including and most especially ourselves. And this changes everything, even as it changes nothing.
This is the path, the path of addiction, a sacred pathway to healing, enlightenment, empowerment, wisdom and awareness. We find that this dirty, humble road we've been traveling has been swept clean to reveal just below the surface a street of gold. The wheel comes full turn, the snake is eating its tail and worlds are without end, kingdoms and places in the soul as yet to be discovered beckon us on to adventure. The process of addiction has alchemically changed our soul. Quite simply our addiction has helped us give birth to a new consciousness and opens the door of everything that has been waiting inside of us. It activates our ability to create the reality of heaven on earth. This is the Alchemy of Addiction.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
At-One-Ment
The word, atonement, is not one that I ever wanted to have in my vocabulary. It always brought to mind thoughts of nasty paybacks, punitive justice, harsh karma, penance and repentence. When I thought of atonement, I'd envision Christ suffering on the cross atoning for our sins. Not something I wanted to focus on.
After today, I no longer feel the same way about this word or the concept in general. The thought of redemption through atonement is now something I might even look forward to if it is needed, because I finally got the courage to stand in it, be with it and look it in the eye and see it for what it really is. For on the other side of making amends, humility and surrender (to my own soul) was not a brutal punishment or a defeating humiliation, but a chance to be as one...to be at one...with someone I dearly love... and with myself...and with the world. Atonement gave me the chance for reunion, reconciliation and a measure of closeness and intimacy that I might not have otherwise experienced... A gleaming jewel in the muck.
a·tone·ment /əˈtoʊnmənt/
–noun
1. satisfaction or reparation for a wrong or injury; amends.
2. the doctrine concerning the reconciliation of God and humankind, esp. as accomplished through the life, suffering, and death of Christ.
3. the experience of humankind's unity with God exemplified by Jesus Christ.
4. reconciliation; agreement.
I found out that when you walk INTO the pain of what you are experiencing, that it may be a mixed bag, but there is treasure in the dark inner place. This religious language that evokes images of self-flagellation and suffering, "atonement" is not a word I thought I'd come to admire. But after I went with it, went into it and saw that what I had judged in another, what had wounded my psyche was EXACTLY something I had done myself. I experienced that the perpetrator and the victim are one.
In the process of reverse engineering my thoughts and not ignoring my feelings, talking openly, praying, meditating and asking for guidance all was revealed. The truth was just there, exposed and vulnerable, but free of anything unclean, no dirty, heavy energy. It just floated up into conscious thought. And it was in that moment that we became as one.
I have always said that we are each other's own personal Jesus Christ. We are each other's saviors and we are saving each other from ourselves. We do this by reflecting back the worst and the best of each other. Sometimes, oh boy....that can be pretty hard to take. In fact, when you do not love yourself, to have your "faults"so clearly highlights is excrutiating.
In the past, when my love for myself was not so apparent to me, I would run. Not physically, necessarily, but emotionally I would curl up into a tight little ball. Oh, on the outside would be what I now call the death smile...the smile that hides a cracking heart. And it is true...the mere act of smiling has a powerful effect on human physiology. A smile can hide alot of sorrow, and sometimes it can make things OK. But sometimes not. And if this becomes one of your coverups for an addiction to running away, you've just done the physical equivalent of putting a smiley face sticker on your gas tank. Because now it's all covered up in goodness and we are just surviving the lie. And it will take a great deal of pain to crack through that exterior.
I want you to know that there is great power in walking into the darkness and remaining vulnerable. It takes great courage and great love to do so. Through the power of true love...true love for myself....for another...for my fellow man I have vowed to wipe that stupid smile off my face and let the real me come forward. The truth does not need to be edited by my smiling face. The truth is the substance of life. And when it is clean and clear to inform our life this is the way to true intimacy - in to me see - and atonement - at-one-ment.
We are all one, at the level of spirit....at the level of the mass consciousness..but we are also individuated on this physical plane. Never forget either of these things, because they are inextricably linked to being with wholeness and providing the powers of compassion and forgiveness needed to forge eternal bonds of love. This after all is why we are here...to love...to be with love...to be in love...to express and create our love in a million points of light, with others, with ourself and with all. I honor all my relations. Even the ones that hurt sometimes. All is one.
Aho
The word, atonement, is not one that I ever wanted to have in my vocabulary. It always brought to mind thoughts of nasty paybacks, punitive justice, harsh karma, penance and repentence. When I thought of atonement, I'd envision Christ suffering on the cross atoning for our sins. Not something I wanted to focus on.
After today, I no longer feel the same way about this word or the concept in general. The thought of redemption through atonement is now something I might even look forward to if it is needed, because I finally got the courage to stand in it, be with it and look it in the eye and see it for what it really is. For on the other side of making amends, humility and surrender (to my own soul) was not a brutal punishment or a defeating humiliation, but a chance to be as one...to be at one...with someone I dearly love... and with myself...and with the world. Atonement gave me the chance for reunion, reconciliation and a measure of closeness and intimacy that I might not have otherwise experienced... A gleaming jewel in the muck.
a·tone·ment /əˈtoʊnmənt/
–noun
1. satisfaction or reparation for a wrong or injury; amends.
2. the doctrine concerning the reconciliation of God and humankind, esp. as accomplished through the life, suffering, and death of Christ.
3. the experience of humankind's unity with God exemplified by Jesus Christ.
4. reconciliation; agreement.
I found out that when you walk INTO the pain of what you are experiencing, that it may be a mixed bag, but there is treasure in the dark inner place. This religious language that evokes images of self-flagellation and suffering, "atonement" is not a word I thought I'd come to admire. But after I went with it, went into it and saw that what I had judged in another, what had wounded my psyche was EXACTLY something I had done myself. I experienced that the perpetrator and the victim are one.
In the process of reverse engineering my thoughts and not ignoring my feelings, talking openly, praying, meditating and asking for guidance all was revealed. The truth was just there, exposed and vulnerable, but free of anything unclean, no dirty, heavy energy. It just floated up into conscious thought. And it was in that moment that we became as one.
I have always said that we are each other's own personal Jesus Christ. We are each other's saviors and we are saving each other from ourselves. We do this by reflecting back the worst and the best of each other. Sometimes, oh boy....that can be pretty hard to take. In fact, when you do not love yourself, to have your "faults"so clearly highlights is excrutiating.
In the past, when my love for myself was not so apparent to me, I would run. Not physically, necessarily, but emotionally I would curl up into a tight little ball. Oh, on the outside would be what I now call the death smile...the smile that hides a cracking heart. And it is true...the mere act of smiling has a powerful effect on human physiology. A smile can hide alot of sorrow, and sometimes it can make things OK. But sometimes not. And if this becomes one of your coverups for an addiction to running away, you've just done the physical equivalent of putting a smiley face sticker on your gas tank. Because now it's all covered up in goodness and we are just surviving the lie. And it will take a great deal of pain to crack through that exterior.
I want you to know that there is great power in walking into the darkness and remaining vulnerable. It takes great courage and great love to do so. Through the power of true love...true love for myself....for another...for my fellow man I have vowed to wipe that stupid smile off my face and let the real me come forward. The truth does not need to be edited by my smiling face. The truth is the substance of life. And when it is clean and clear to inform our life this is the way to true intimacy - in to me see - and atonement - at-one-ment.
We are all one, at the level of spirit....at the level of the mass consciousness..but we are also individuated on this physical plane. Never forget either of these things, because they are inextricably linked to being with wholeness and providing the powers of compassion and forgiveness needed to forge eternal bonds of love. This after all is why we are here...to love...to be with love...to be in love...to express and create our love in a million points of light, with others, with ourself and with all. I honor all my relations. Even the ones that hurt sometimes. All is one.
Aho
Friday, February 01, 2008
The Spider & The Ant
Anger, grief, sadness: what a concoction of emotions. What good comes of feeling these things? At first glance these emotions seem like the biggest waste of time. We can't wait to move out of those spaces and into smiles and feeling good.
I know that there isn't anything wrong with wanting to feel good and be at peace. But I'm starting to get a sense of something unseen here. Something unseen in my anger, my grief, my sadness. What is it? I think it's motion, movement. Yes, that's it. I'm starting to see that I had to go down into the lower world, because I couldn't raise the vibration on my own. I'm rebounding with it. I'm like a rubber ball being thrown to the bottom of a black pit and the minute I hit bottom, is when I start my upward ascent. Boing!
So being the intensely curious person that I am, I am really wanting to know why this process occurs. Why do I have to experience this pain? Why do I need the rebound process? Is that just the way it is? Is there a better way to be moved to action? When do you let go and when do you hang on?
I guess you have to take it case by case, situation by situation, moment by moment. And another thing I've noticed is that if I haven't been doing good maintenance on the crap in my life, boy does it sneak up and bite me.
So back to anger and grief and sadness. Boy do these feelings suck. I am so agitated right now I could cry. Aha...clue... number one. Cry!!!! Yes, so mad I could cry. Body trying to move it out of my system. And here I've been blocking that process. Dammit! Why did I do that? Now I'm mad that I blocked the crying!!! Yeash, I'm going to be here a while I can see that.
I'm just going to go into automatic writing mode. Bear with me. Anger moves me to take action. My soul is trying to tell me that something is not right. I am not being congruent. These lies that lay before me are what they are, but they are something more. They are reminders of my lies. My lies to myself. My penchant for running, for denial. I can be such a scared little doe, which makes me want to roar like a lion. Yes, roar.
When I am afraid, I run. I am getting so much better at this. And I don't run away from everything, but I do run still from some things. I know. My soul is trying to get me unblocked. I need to get this horrendous marriage dissolved. I need to break this contract. Contracts weigh on me and they steal my energy when the other party blocks me, disrespects me, tries to control me.
Aha, just got an aha moment. Last week I was mercifully released from a business contract with some people that I found impossible to work with effectively. Outer ego suffered for about 2 seconds, but mostly it was such a profound relief to be free of this mismatch. Earlier that day the beautiful spider web I am monitoring on my walks with my dog had a bit of drama which I now see foreshadowed this event and continues to do so.
I happened to be watching when the spider came out of her little cave at the center of the web and snagged a big juicy ant. I watched her work and it was quite impressive. But then, she lost her grip and the ant fell right to the ground. I felt instant dismay, not just because she had lost her kill, but because I knew the ant was already mostly dead. As I write this now I realize that this was an omen of what had been brewing for me. And so even though loss of any sort can be uncomfortable, it is a stage which we must pass through in order to regain our energy. BECAUSE WHAT WE ARE USUALLY LOSING DOES NOT SERVE OUR SOUL PURPOSE!
No big shock here for me. What I am losing not only doesn't support my soul purpose, it actually can't sustain my life or the life of those I love and my family. In reality this type of loss is a gain. A gain of freedom. Oh Butterfly Maiden here I come. In February our Goddess Circle is using the archetype of Butterfly Maiden. She is all about transformation. So I guess I am in the chrysalis right now. Perhaps this is the emergence of something pretty special.
Let it go, let it go, let it go. Do what is right, but get your energy hooks out of it and get it's energy hooks out of me. Surrender doesn't mean you do nothing. It means you just do what is right for you, what will put you back in congruency with your conscience. Your surrender is to your soul and your higher self. That might mean taking someone to court or filing for divorce or it might mean an apology or forgiveness is in order....or all of the above! The point is that any of that can be done from a place of love, not hate. And I'm seeing if you have to USE anger to get yourself moving, then you aren't loving yourself. Because most anger directed at other people, is only mirroring the anger that you feel for yourself.
I'm reclaiming my energy. I withdraw my energy tentacles, my atomic thought particles are coming back to me, my soul sparks are mine. And I release this to my higher self. She always has the right answer.
Anger, grief, sadness: what a concoction of emotions. What good comes of feeling these things? At first glance these emotions seem like the biggest waste of time. We can't wait to move out of those spaces and into smiles and feeling good.
I know that there isn't anything wrong with wanting to feel good and be at peace. But I'm starting to get a sense of something unseen here. Something unseen in my anger, my grief, my sadness. What is it? I think it's motion, movement. Yes, that's it. I'm starting to see that I had to go down into the lower world, because I couldn't raise the vibration on my own. I'm rebounding with it. I'm like a rubber ball being thrown to the bottom of a black pit and the minute I hit bottom, is when I start my upward ascent. Boing!
So being the intensely curious person that I am, I am really wanting to know why this process occurs. Why do I have to experience this pain? Why do I need the rebound process? Is that just the way it is? Is there a better way to be moved to action? When do you let go and when do you hang on?
I guess you have to take it case by case, situation by situation, moment by moment. And another thing I've noticed is that if I haven't been doing good maintenance on the crap in my life, boy does it sneak up and bite me.
So back to anger and grief and sadness. Boy do these feelings suck. I am so agitated right now I could cry. Aha...clue... number one. Cry!!!! Yes, so mad I could cry. Body trying to move it out of my system. And here I've been blocking that process. Dammit! Why did I do that? Now I'm mad that I blocked the crying!!! Yeash, I'm going to be here a while I can see that.
I'm just going to go into automatic writing mode. Bear with me. Anger moves me to take action. My soul is trying to tell me that something is not right. I am not being congruent. These lies that lay before me are what they are, but they are something more. They are reminders of my lies. My lies to myself. My penchant for running, for denial. I can be such a scared little doe, which makes me want to roar like a lion. Yes, roar.
When I am afraid, I run. I am getting so much better at this. And I don't run away from everything, but I do run still from some things. I know. My soul is trying to get me unblocked. I need to get this horrendous marriage dissolved. I need to break this contract. Contracts weigh on me and they steal my energy when the other party blocks me, disrespects me, tries to control me.
Aha, just got an aha moment. Last week I was mercifully released from a business contract with some people that I found impossible to work with effectively. Outer ego suffered for about 2 seconds, but mostly it was such a profound relief to be free of this mismatch. Earlier that day the beautiful spider web I am monitoring on my walks with my dog had a bit of drama which I now see foreshadowed this event and continues to do so.
I happened to be watching when the spider came out of her little cave at the center of the web and snagged a big juicy ant. I watched her work and it was quite impressive. But then, she lost her grip and the ant fell right to the ground. I felt instant dismay, not just because she had lost her kill, but because I knew the ant was already mostly dead. As I write this now I realize that this was an omen of what had been brewing for me. And so even though loss of any sort can be uncomfortable, it is a stage which we must pass through in order to regain our energy. BECAUSE WHAT WE ARE USUALLY LOSING DOES NOT SERVE OUR SOUL PURPOSE!
No big shock here for me. What I am losing not only doesn't support my soul purpose, it actually can't sustain my life or the life of those I love and my family. In reality this type of loss is a gain. A gain of freedom. Oh Butterfly Maiden here I come. In February our Goddess Circle is using the archetype of Butterfly Maiden. She is all about transformation. So I guess I am in the chrysalis right now. Perhaps this is the emergence of something pretty special.
Let it go, let it go, let it go. Do what is right, but get your energy hooks out of it and get it's energy hooks out of me. Surrender doesn't mean you do nothing. It means you just do what is right for you, what will put you back in congruency with your conscience. Your surrender is to your soul and your higher self. That might mean taking someone to court or filing for divorce or it might mean an apology or forgiveness is in order....or all of the above! The point is that any of that can be done from a place of love, not hate. And I'm seeing if you have to USE anger to get yourself moving, then you aren't loving yourself. Because most anger directed at other people, is only mirroring the anger that you feel for yourself.
I'm reclaiming my energy. I withdraw my energy tentacles, my atomic thought particles are coming back to me, my soul sparks are mine. And I release this to my higher self. She always has the right answer.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
KUNDALINI ENERGY - THE SERPENTI found this image and it spoke to me. An Angel presiding over the Man and the Woman and as usual, at the foot of the scene is Snake, upon first glance intimating temptation. This statue is a representation of the Medicine Wheel to me. That is how incredibly flexible and open the wheel is. I'm seeing this image as if I had laid it flat and tipped it backward. At this perspective the Angel is South, the Snake is North, the Man is East and the Woman is West.
This has great meaning to me. I see the message and I understand why the Serpent is so misunderstood. By aligning this image within the grid of the Medicine Wheel I am given great insight. The Serpent in the position of the North represents what we manifest. It is not evil, it just is what is. If you'll notice, the Snake is encircling the entire statue. This represents to me how incredibly powerful and what great work lies within the energy of Snake. For Snake turns energy into form. It is what actually takes the unmanifest and gives it life! I find it really interesting that if the statue is looked at while facing North, the serpent would be in the south. In which case it would be instigating healing and the energy would be coming down into us, into the earth. It is us who calls forth that energy back out of the earth and allows it to travel upward, through the energy system of our bodies and out into the world.
The man is the embodiment of masculine energy, and he stands on the right hand side which controls the left brain activity of our brain where we process with logic, reason and intellect. The woman is on the left side of the angel where she controls the right brain activity and brings us emotions, feelings and passion. At the top is the Angel. To me the Angel is our heart or our spirit. It is our connection to Universal Law and All that Is.
Where all the spokes of our wheel come together and meet in the center is our core. No one part is more valuable or precious than the other. And any aspect neglected or given too much attention will create disharmony. It is only when we open the channel and clear the vessels of our intellectual, spiritual, emotional and physical bodies that we can get to our center. Imagine feeling that clear and clean and close. I am imagining that and I want to attain that level of clarity and purity.
I now view this image in an entirely different light, than I did prior to my reflection. I don't draw any negativity or any judgement of good or evil. To me, now this image is an icon of the four aspects that bring me my ability to connect with being human and to reach the full potential of being human. It's just about the beautiful state of being human and being alive. What if being human is the reward?
May you be
blessed today
in many
little ways.
Even in your busy-ness, I hope you can see the beauty that abounds and that if you are surrounded
by anything other than light it is only so that you can know the difference between the two.
For the dark
provides the
contrast
only there
so you
can see
what is
wrong and
what is
right
what you
want and
do not want
So that
you can
reach a
little higher
for the
stars
for the
light
of day
for the
fullness
of the
moon
and allow
yourself
to feel
worthiness
of what
is already
embedded
in
all
that
is
and
that
is
love.
blessed today
in many
little ways.
Even in your busy-ness, I hope you can see the beauty that abounds and that if you are surrounded
by anything other than light it is only so that you can know the difference between the two.
For the dark
provides the
contrast
only there
so you
can see
what is
wrong and
what is
right
what you
want and
do not want
So that
you can
reach a
little higher
for the
stars
for the
light
of day
for the
fullness
of the
moon
and allow
yourself
to feel
worthiness
of what
is already
embedded
in
all
that
is
and
that
is
love.
The Seven Sacraments as Decoded by the Medicine Wheel
By Renee Bledsoe
The Catholics have it half right. I don't believe that the 7 sacraments in any part are reserved only for the clergy, nor anyone of a certain religious affiliation. For the most part they are not even reserved for only the worthy. I believe they are the birthright of all humans and have been infected with the remnants of a time in which church organizations were attempting to control through the subversion of power and disinformation. Or maybe we weren't ready for the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Who knows? At any rate here we are now and moving forward read on if you're game....
Baptism - Guess what....if you were born...you've been baptized - you were born of water, you were immersed in the holy womb of your mother, you were dipped and dunked (in totality - there is no basis to the debate of whether you have to go all the way under or not - you certainly do as I've never heard of a half full womb!) usually for an entire 9 months and then in one moment of perfection you came sliding out (ok, some of us were forced out) true to the miracle of this creation and the law of manifestion....you appeared into form the perfect blend of earth, air, fire, water and spirit. And to think it all started with the wink in your daddy's eye.
Confirmation - Another shocking thing to discover here....if you breathed your first breathe of life you were "confirmed" and you received the breath of life aka Holy Spirit, Chi, Life force, Prana, which is truly what sustains you moment by moment as you inhale and exhale day in and day out the only substance that every living being is allowed to be addicted to: air. Breathe deeply.
Eucharist - As you are made of flesh and blood, and the day you took your first bite of the fruits of life, bread and water, nourishment and the holy sustenance so graciously birthed from our mother earth....again....you took holy communion. And each day as you eat and drink, what you take into your body....is what you become (now that's a scary thought).
Confession/Repentence - Being the humans that we are, totally programmed to learn by trial and error, of course, we are bound to miss the mark upon occassion (the long, lost definition of the word "sin"). Yet we are equally as endowed with the ability to "get it right", make amends and do that pretty cool self-correcting thing that we do called....saying "I'm sorry" and never knowingly or maliciously doing it again. Of course that comes usually after several years of emotional turmoil and loads of drama where we confess everybody else's sins over and over again to any of our poor friends who will let us dump on them. Usually when we run out of such friends, we'll hire someone to do the job that we don't destroy in the process, because they CAN actually give us UPR (unconditional positive regard) without losing their own souls....these people would include, counselors, therapists, spiritual healers and priests....and they might actually help us understand that it's our own "sins" that we need to work on and not everyone else's. Enough said.
Matrimony - Ah, now this one is going to be a reach for most of us. First of all because we think it's all about finding a mate. And it is....but there's one little thing that we forget about as we enter into this most sacred rite: You've got to love yourself (all of yourself) before you can actually love someone else. So trite, but so frustratingly true (why it won't go away). And so this is the first sacred matrimony that we must enter into, the relationship that we have with ourself! Holy cow, so what I'm saying is the first person you've got to seek divine union with is yourself....the marriage of the left and right brain, the artist and the scientist, the masculine and feminine or the yin and yang in YOU! When that happens souls will collide! Relationships will actually be the culmination of two whole beings, not two cripples looking for missing parts. Children will be born to whole, healthy and balanced people...and, oh my gosh! we'll actually get to see what true love LOOKS like perhaps in more than a fleeting moment of heroism, and maybe even a lifetime of unabashed joy! (Can you tell that I really like this sacrament?)
Holy Orders - Now this is the one that really irks me - Another news flash - We ALL get holy orders, not just priests. However, having said that, most people don't actually read or comprehend their holy orders. And so I do get what the priests are trying to embody for us: For God's sake PICK UP YOUR HOLY ORDERS! In other words, find your joy, find your bliss, find your purpose....and dag gone it....do it! March soldier! Motivate me!
Extreme Unction - I can tell you that you won't get to Extreme Unction or "the annointing of the sick" until you've done all of the above. Because once you've done all of the above, you will have raised your consciousness level and your spiritual vibration to at least a good 700 (nearing the status of avatar) and we all know how rare that is. BALONEY! Don't you see that most of the seven sacraments have been fulfilled JUST BY YOUR MERE EXISTENCE AND THAT YOU WERE BORN AND ARE ALIVE? I say dive into Extreme Unction head first! Yes, even thieves can heal the sick (I wasn't implying anything). A kind word or a smile at just the right moment might stop that suicide. You never know! So, keep raising your vibration, keep healing your own self and then even in your halfway, snaggle-puss partially healed state carry hope to those who are even less fortunate than you are. I don't care how you do it...and you darn sure don't need to be a priest. But if you've healed yourself, had any sort of success, have started to feel any sort of joy or raising of your own spirits - get out there and SHARE it! There's always someone who is worse off than you...and each and everytime you extend a leg up to someone whose vibration is just a little bit lower than yours (or a lot bit) you will continue to exponentially raise your own. And pretty soon, you will be an avatar...which is just another way of saying that you will be experiencing heaven on earth and you will be helping others to do the same. And some of you just might raise your energy level, your spirits, your vibration or whatever you want to call it to such a high level that your presence, your beautiful smile, your loving touch, your comforting words just might be a beacon and a light in the darkness by which anyone in your sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence (you get the picture) will be raised up.
The word helping means: hel (Hell) + ping (To strike with a hard blow)
To hell with hell, I'm opting for a heavenly experience here on earth myself... how about you?
By Renee Bledsoe
The Catholics have it half right. I don't believe that the 7 sacraments in any part are reserved only for the clergy, nor anyone of a certain religious affiliation. For the most part they are not even reserved for only the worthy. I believe they are the birthright of all humans and have been infected with the remnants of a time in which church organizations were attempting to control through the subversion of power and disinformation. Or maybe we weren't ready for the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Who knows? At any rate here we are now and moving forward read on if you're game....
Baptism - Guess what....if you were born...you've been baptized - you were born of water, you were immersed in the holy womb of your mother, you were dipped and dunked (in totality - there is no basis to the debate of whether you have to go all the way under or not - you certainly do as I've never heard of a half full womb!) usually for an entire 9 months and then in one moment of perfection you came sliding out (ok, some of us were forced out) true to the miracle of this creation and the law of manifestion....you appeared into form the perfect blend of earth, air, fire, water and spirit. And to think it all started with the wink in your daddy's eye.
Confirmation - Another shocking thing to discover here....if you breathed your first breathe of life you were "confirmed" and you received the breath of life aka Holy Spirit, Chi, Life force, Prana, which is truly what sustains you moment by moment as you inhale and exhale day in and day out the only substance that every living being is allowed to be addicted to: air. Breathe deeply.
Eucharist - As you are made of flesh and blood, and the day you took your first bite of the fruits of life, bread and water, nourishment and the holy sustenance so graciously birthed from our mother earth....again....you took holy communion. And each day as you eat and drink, what you take into your body....is what you become (now that's a scary thought).
Confession/Repentence - Being the humans that we are, totally programmed to learn by trial and error, of course, we are bound to miss the mark upon occassion (the long, lost definition of the word "sin"). Yet we are equally as endowed with the ability to "get it right", make amends and do that pretty cool self-correcting thing that we do called....saying "I'm sorry" and never knowingly or maliciously doing it again. Of course that comes usually after several years of emotional turmoil and loads of drama where we confess everybody else's sins over and over again to any of our poor friends who will let us dump on them. Usually when we run out of such friends, we'll hire someone to do the job that we don't destroy in the process, because they CAN actually give us UPR (unconditional positive regard) without losing their own souls....these people would include, counselors, therapists, spiritual healers and priests....and they might actually help us understand that it's our own "sins" that we need to work on and not everyone else's. Enough said.
Matrimony - Ah, now this one is going to be a reach for most of us. First of all because we think it's all about finding a mate. And it is....but there's one little thing that we forget about as we enter into this most sacred rite: You've got to love yourself (all of yourself) before you can actually love someone else. So trite, but so frustratingly true (why it won't go away). And so this is the first sacred matrimony that we must enter into, the relationship that we have with ourself! Holy cow, so what I'm saying is the first person you've got to seek divine union with is yourself....the marriage of the left and right brain, the artist and the scientist, the masculine and feminine or the yin and yang in YOU! When that happens souls will collide! Relationships will actually be the culmination of two whole beings, not two cripples looking for missing parts. Children will be born to whole, healthy and balanced people...and, oh my gosh! we'll actually get to see what true love LOOKS like perhaps in more than a fleeting moment of heroism, and maybe even a lifetime of unabashed joy! (Can you tell that I really like this sacrament?)
Holy Orders - Now this is the one that really irks me - Another news flash - We ALL get holy orders, not just priests. However, having said that, most people don't actually read or comprehend their holy orders. And so I do get what the priests are trying to embody for us: For God's sake PICK UP YOUR HOLY ORDERS! In other words, find your joy, find your bliss, find your purpose....and dag gone it....do it! March soldier! Motivate me!
Extreme Unction - I can tell you that you won't get to Extreme Unction or "the annointing of the sick" until you've done all of the above. Because once you've done all of the above, you will have raised your consciousness level and your spiritual vibration to at least a good 700 (nearing the status of avatar) and we all know how rare that is. BALONEY! Don't you see that most of the seven sacraments have been fulfilled JUST BY YOUR MERE EXISTENCE AND THAT YOU WERE BORN AND ARE ALIVE? I say dive into Extreme Unction head first! Yes, even thieves can heal the sick (I wasn't implying anything). A kind word or a smile at just the right moment might stop that suicide. You never know! So, keep raising your vibration, keep healing your own self and then even in your halfway, snaggle-puss partially healed state carry hope to those who are even less fortunate than you are. I don't care how you do it...and you darn sure don't need to be a priest. But if you've healed yourself, had any sort of success, have started to feel any sort of joy or raising of your own spirits - get out there and SHARE it! There's always someone who is worse off than you...and each and everytime you extend a leg up to someone whose vibration is just a little bit lower than yours (or a lot bit) you will continue to exponentially raise your own. And pretty soon, you will be an avatar...which is just another way of saying that you will be experiencing heaven on earth and you will be helping others to do the same. And some of you just might raise your energy level, your spirits, your vibration or whatever you want to call it to such a high level that your presence, your beautiful smile, your loving touch, your comforting words just might be a beacon and a light in the darkness by which anyone in your sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence, and their sphere of influence (you get the picture) will be raised up.
The word helping means: hel (Hell) + ping (To strike with a hard blow)
To hell with hell, I'm opting for a heavenly experience here on earth myself... how about you?
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
MESSAGES IN THE MUCK
It is the highest good of all concerned only that I care about. I trust God so completely in all matters. So very many things have happened in my life which have been so much bigger than I could handle on my own. And I know now that in many ways that is part of the lesson to be learned. When innocent children are abused, neglected or molested.....there is only one cure for that and it is God....the God consciousness within and without, above and below. Bringing that energy down through the human vessel is the ONLY solution. How that takes shape and what that looks like is where we get to be creative.
There was this really, really long line of cars in the parent pickup line, and I was glad because it was going to give me time to be by myself and stay with my feelings. And then this car sort of somehow wiggles in front of me (like it came out of nowhere). It had a single bumper sticker on the back bumper, nothing fancy....it just said Trust God in purple script letters. And then the car pulled back out of the line and left. Then right in front of my windshield the most beautiful blue dragonfly I have ever seen hovered for about 2 full minutes. She is the Truth Teller in my Addiction Alchemy card deck. She also is a time keeper and is a transformational creature that signifies a slower process with very profound results. Her energy was magical. I was instantly comforted. They were letting me know that it is going to be alright! And that we are on the right track in breaking with denial and coming out of the darkness. And I felt the hand of God and the angels at work in these seemingly innocuous events.
I swear the angels are always here for us. I feel so foolish when I forget to call to them. They are so incredibly powerful and they are in service to us all the time. And whenever I need it they will send me a sign. Without this support it would be almost impossible to come out of denial and dissociation to deal with some of the things that some of us have had to endure. It is possible to create our own feeling of safety, because we are protected by something much more powerful than any human.
It is the highest good of all concerned only that I care about. I trust God so completely in all matters. So very many things have happened in my life which have been so much bigger than I could handle on my own. And I know now that in many ways that is part of the lesson to be learned. When innocent children are abused, neglected or molested.....there is only one cure for that and it is God....the God consciousness within and without, above and below. Bringing that energy down through the human vessel is the ONLY solution. How that takes shape and what that looks like is where we get to be creative.
There was this really, really long line of cars in the parent pickup line, and I was glad because it was going to give me time to be by myself and stay with my feelings. And then this car sort of somehow wiggles in front of me (like it came out of nowhere). It had a single bumper sticker on the back bumper, nothing fancy....it just said Trust God in purple script letters. And then the car pulled back out of the line and left. Then right in front of my windshield the most beautiful blue dragonfly I have ever seen hovered for about 2 full minutes. She is the Truth Teller in my Addiction Alchemy card deck. She also is a time keeper and is a transformational creature that signifies a slower process with very profound results. Her energy was magical. I was instantly comforted. They were letting me know that it is going to be alright! And that we are on the right track in breaking with denial and coming out of the darkness. And I felt the hand of God and the angels at work in these seemingly innocuous events.
I swear the angels are always here for us. I feel so foolish when I forget to call to them. They are so incredibly powerful and they are in service to us all the time. And whenever I need it they will send me a sign. Without this support it would be almost impossible to come out of denial and dissociation to deal with some of the things that some of us have had to endure. It is possible to create our own feeling of safety, because we are protected by something much more powerful than any human.
DIVINE UNION
On this earth
I walk my way
Magical moments
Fill each day
With overwhelming evidence
Of life's true experience
The way is paved
With awesome wonder
Winds that whisper
Rain and Thunder
The bursting blooms
The fragrant grass
Fill my senses
Full at last
Blessed beings
Mend my heart
Sending Light
To every part
Yes I am me
The secret one
Night by moon
And day by sun
And as my soul
Creeps further down
Into the spiral
I am bound
To be a sacred
Mystic's song
A sigh, a cry
An echo long
Of radiant, present
Holy love
As it is below,
So it is above.
by Renee Bledsoe
copyright 2007
Monday, August 06, 2007
Hey D,
I am so glad that your comfort level and feeling of well being has increased while you are in the sacred circle of the medicine wheel. This indicates that an even greater degree of the darkness that you were holding onto has greatly shifted into the Light. If you are actually reporting an increasing sense of well-being then this is even more true. There are many, many people who would find it impossible to even sit in that space for very long at all. It's why they drop or at the very least don't travel directly with the clan and do a catch-up ceremony. The darkness is greatly vanquished by the Light and the pain is created when our ego tries to hold onto it because it is what we know and even though we are not happy it is what we are comfortable with. It is our resistance to the Light....to OUR OWN LIGHT...OUR OWN GREATNESS...that actually causes the most suffering.
I am really excited because I am now in totally uncharted territory as we move to the Center of the wheel. We are moving to our center....and I am getting chills just writing this. As soon as we move into a direction I get downloads about the energy and then it trickles in bit by bit and pretty much the days just prior are filled with messages. David, we are going to be re-born and go home...and we are going to see God and experience the brilliance of the Light in all it's unimaginable splendor. I am crying right now because I can feel it coming. It isn't a feeling of....oh it will be better when this happens or that happens...it is a coming to fruition of something very lovingly intended and a revelation of what has always been. It is an experiencing of the CAUSE AND the EFFECT of our being and our joy and a true understanding so that we can see it at work in our everyday lives. It is a sacred marriage as we see that we are ourselves the CAUSE and the EFFECT of the realization and actualization of our own God/Goddess selves. It is beauty, romance, passion, devotion and delight all rolled into one like a never ending gently lapping surf and not an overwhelming tidal wave, which climaxes and then has nothing more to give. But you have to be very still within yourself to allow it to flower. And that's why we miss it so often. We don't recognize what is right before us.
I don't know if you felt this in the wheel, but I am feeling it more than ever. The edges of my selfhood on the spiritual plane are connecting more and more with my clansman. While my physical form is quite delineated. And so I am truly able to understand and what's more FEEL how my healing affects the healing of others and vice versa. It is no longer an intellectual concept. I sense it and feel it and the Spirit is every increasingly embodied in my flesh.
Your slow down message is right on. Everything comes through the slowing down process. It is a master key.
Interesting isn't it.
Love you,
R
I am so glad that your comfort level and feeling of well being has increased while you are in the sacred circle of the medicine wheel. This indicates that an even greater degree of the darkness that you were holding onto has greatly shifted into the Light. If you are actually reporting an increasing sense of well-being then this is even more true. There are many, many people who would find it impossible to even sit in that space for very long at all. It's why they drop or at the very least don't travel directly with the clan and do a catch-up ceremony. The darkness is greatly vanquished by the Light and the pain is created when our ego tries to hold onto it because it is what we know and even though we are not happy it is what we are comfortable with. It is our resistance to the Light....to OUR OWN LIGHT...OUR OWN GREATNESS...that actually causes the most suffering.
I am really excited because I am now in totally uncharted territory as we move to the Center of the wheel. We are moving to our center....and I am getting chills just writing this. As soon as we move into a direction I get downloads about the energy and then it trickles in bit by bit and pretty much the days just prior are filled with messages. David, we are going to be re-born and go home...and we are going to see God and experience the brilliance of the Light in all it's unimaginable splendor. I am crying right now because I can feel it coming. It isn't a feeling of....oh it will be better when this happens or that happens...it is a coming to fruition of something very lovingly intended and a revelation of what has always been. It is an experiencing of the CAUSE AND the EFFECT of our being and our joy and a true understanding so that we can see it at work in our everyday lives. It is a sacred marriage as we see that we are ourselves the CAUSE and the EFFECT of the realization and actualization of our own God/Goddess selves. It is beauty, romance, passion, devotion and delight all rolled into one like a never ending gently lapping surf and not an overwhelming tidal wave, which climaxes and then has nothing more to give. But you have to be very still within yourself to allow it to flower. And that's why we miss it so often. We don't recognize what is right before us.
I don't know if you felt this in the wheel, but I am feeling it more than ever. The edges of my selfhood on the spiritual plane are connecting more and more with my clansman. While my physical form is quite delineated. And so I am truly able to understand and what's more FEEL how my healing affects the healing of others and vice versa. It is no longer an intellectual concept. I sense it and feel it and the Spirit is every increasingly embodied in my flesh.
Your slow down message is right on. Everything comes through the slowing down process. It is a master key.
Interesting isn't it.
Love you,
R
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